Overcoming Anger

Mental Health Coaching/Consulting, Psychoanalysis, Overcoming Anger

What is Anger?

Anger is a natural emotion. It stems from hurt feelings, traumas, without a resolution. Anger is a power emotion. It is easier to be angry, than to sit in hurt feelings. Anger gives hope for redemption. Anger is action. With anger, you can act impulsively. However, when feeling hurt, it can paralyze one in the moment.

What happens when one doesn’t process the deeper feelings behind anger? Well, a temper develops, resulting in acting out. Unresolved anger can last for years, with many sabotaged opportunities, burned bridges, job terminations, bad relationship choices, self hate behavior, drugs, etc. Unresolved anger can be dangerous. Addressing the pain behind the anger, such as, feeling unheard, unseen, taken advantage of, unimportant, slighted, dismissed etc.

 

Now lets talk about overcoming Anger?

The thing about anger is, if not appropriately resolved through spiritual practice, insight building, therapy, psychoanalysis or other healing practices, it will remain in place, stuck and frozen in time. In fact, when you are experiencing stuckness and having a hard time resolving something, especially if it is deep within the unconscious, you may experience anger the same way you did when the injustice took place, also known as, Post Traumatic Stress Anger. Post Traumatic Stress Anger is a term I’ll use for the time being to describe frozen energy.

After deciding to resolve anger little by little, you are now ready to heal, and with healing, there can be resistance. Resistance is like a back and forth motion, which occurs often in the healing space, because people are familiar with the survival traits and defenses that have been used for a large amount of time. Ever heard the saying, “The Devil you know is better than the devil you don’t know”. All that saying means is, fear takes place when change is on the verge.

Many people want to overcome anger, because ultimately, people wish to be happy. But with deciding to overcome anger, the question comes about. What will you do with the rest of your time? The thing about healing is, you have to fill the old habits and inner demons with new habits and angel energy. For example, in AA programs, it is suggested that, when choosing sobriety, one must find other healthy habits, to fill the void. I truly believe one of the major reasons for resistance is, fear. Fear of change. Fear of releasing familiarity. Fear of risking comfort.

Overcoming Anger means: resolving unconscious material, unfreezing stuck energy, healing and last but not least, filling the voids of what you overcome.

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